Season 5 Quotes

Harbingers in the Fountain 5x01 
Cam: Dr Brennan, would you care to hug?
Brennan: Why?
Cam: Ok. I'm good with that. Welcome home. 
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Cam: You're in love with Dr. Brennan. (smiles at him)

Booth: What I'm wondering is, am I the same guy?
Cam: Uhh ... sweet, kickass, FBI murder solver with hard fists and a lion heart?
Booth: Uh huh.
Cam: Yep, you're still him. My advice, for what it's worth, forget the bruised brain and go with your lion heart.
Booth: Right. Right. Yeah, and tell Bones how I feel.
Cam: Yes. Except, be sure about your feelings, because if you crack that shell and you change your mind, she'll die of loneliness before she'll ever trust anyone ever again.
Booth: Right.

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Avalon: (doing a  tarrot card reading on Brennan) The riddle you can't solve is how somebody could love you.
Brennan: (scoffs) Well I'm, beautiful and very intelligent.
Avalon: The answer to the question that you're afraid to say out loud is ... yes. He knows the truth of you, and he is dazzled by that truth
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Brennan: What did you wanna tell me? 
Booth: That I love you (pause).You know, In a professional atta girl kinda way (lightly punches her on the arm)
Brennan: Atta girl kinda way?
Booth: (nods)
Brennan: Right back at ya Booth. I love you too (punches his arm playfully). Atta boy. 

The Bond in the Boot 5x02 
Hodgins: Everybody poops. They even wrote a book about it 
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Booth: You know Bones, I'm glad that ... you know, we don't have any secrets between each other.
Brennan: Yeah, I like that.
Booth: And if we have something on our mind, we just ... we just share it.
Brennan: Sure. Even with all the financial and intellectual contradictions, I still feel close to you.
Booth: Right. Because you know, none of that stuff really matters anyway.
Brennan: Sometimes, looking at it through your eyes, I believe that.

5x03 The Plain in the Prodigy
Brennan: (looks at Cams book) Is that a cartoon rendering of a penis in your book?
Cam: Why I guess it is. Look at that.
Brennan: Why is it talking?
Cam: Isn't Booth expecting you?
Brennan: (smiles) It's cute
  
Booth: You know, when I was a kid, Bones, I always wanted to be a hobo. I wanted to ride the rails, play the guitar ...
Bones: Be malnourished, riddled with preventable disease.
Booth: Tell you what. You know what? You could make Santa Claus cry. You really could.

Cam: When do teenagers start having sex?
Angela: (surprised) Hello?
Hodgins: If they could, they'd start in the morning and go until they drop.
Clark: Please tell me this is about the case?

5x04 The Bond in the Boot 
Hodgins: What kind of creep breaks up with someone over e-mail?
Angela: Yeah. Well, like there's an acceptable protocol for crushing someone's soul.

Bones: Didn't your book for imbeciles teach you how to avoid injury?
Booth: No, the bookstore they ran out of copies, and it's book for dummies, not book for imbeciles.

A Night at the Bones Museum 5x05

Daisy: Was I too hard on Lance?
Hodgins: Focus, Daisy.
Daisy: Okay. But you're a man. Lance is so cute, isn't he?
Hodgins: Yeah, that'd be a question for a woman.
Daisy: Someone that cute isn't malicious. He can't be.
Hodgins: You really don't need me for this conversation, do you.

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Booth: What are you talking about, Bones? You're great at these things. Listen, you changed history. How many people can say that?
Brennan: You can. Every arrest you make changes history. You make the world safer.
Booth: With your help. (Pause) So, Andrew thought you were going to take him to this thing. That's what he told me.
Brennan: I was, yes, but you and I, this was our case. And I guess... what goes on between us...that should just be ours. Isn't that what you said?
Booth: Yeah.

5x06 The Tough Man in the Tender Chicken

Booth: Listen, Bones, I would do anything for you. I would die for you, I would kill for you, but I am not getting in between two best friends.

The Dwarf In The Dirt - 5x07
Booth: I had a bad day on the range
Brennan: Is that a cowboy metaphor?
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Vincent Nigel Murray: Could he have been stabbed?
Brennan: With what?
Vincent Nigel Murray: The worlds dullest knife
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Booth: Would you do me a favor?
Brennan: Yes, as long as it does not involve me shaving my head. (smiles at Booth)
Booth: (laughs) You are making a joke.
Brennan: I'm becoming quite amusing
Booth: Yes you are. It's very funny. Honestly, will you do me a favor?
Brennan: Yes, as long as i don't have to shave my head. (smiles at Booth)
Booth: (laughs) A little advice on the humor, once the joke happens, let it go, don't dogpile on it 

The Foot In The Foreclosure - 5x08 

Pops: And who's this? A friend of Parker's?
Sweets: (laughs)
Booth: This here is Dr. Sweets
Pops: A doctor? I don't think so
Booth: No, it is
Brennan: It's true
Pops: Where did you get your MD? In a cracker jack box?

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Angela: Hey, Booth must be cute with his grandfather, huh?
Brennan: His grandfather calls him “Shrimp.” Booth seems to like it, which I don’t understand.
Angela: Well, it’s because it makes him feel loved, like when he actually was a shrimp.
Brennan: So the moniker is a sign of affection?
Angela: (smiling) Very good, Brennan. You never had a nickname?
Brennan: Oh no. Just what Booth calls me. Just ... just Bones.

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Booth: There's nothing going on between us
Pops: You gay?
Booth: What? NO!
Pops: She's a keeper, you should listen to me. I warned you about Rebecca being a waste of time didn't I?
Booth: C'mon Pops I can take care of my own love life.
Pops: I don't think so. 

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Pops: I like her, she's real. She's got balls.
Brennan: Well...ovaries actually.
Pops: Alright, you've got a pair of steel ovaries.
Brennan: Thank you.

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Girl: Hi baby, you're not with the celery stick are you?
Booth: Nooo...I mean yes (Puts arm around Brennan)
Brennan: My body mass index is within the accepted medical norms.
Girl: You don't know what you're missing.

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Pops: Everyone needs someone....don't be scared.
Brennan: Scared? What? I'm not scared of anything...
Pops: It all goes by so fast, you don't want any regrets.
Brennan: I don't understand.
Pops: Yes you do.

The Goop on the Girl - 5x10

Brennan: You have a perfect acromion. Stand up. 

Booth: Whoa! Is there stuff on my pants? 

Brennan: Vascular tissue on your cocky belt buckle (takes off his belt)

Booth: All right. Slides right off. And now we're done. 

Brennan: Nope. I have to remove your pants. 

Booth: All right, you know, I'm just going to start reciting some saints. St. Joseph, St. Peter, St. Paul, St. John...  

Cam: (opens door to find Brennan kneeling in front of Booth) Anyone for mistletoe? 

Brennan: I'm recovering evidence. 

Booth: Just evidence! That's all!

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Hodgins: Where's your chest hair? 

Booth: I'm highly evolved! 

Brennan: His pubic extension is entirely within normal...

Booth: Okay. Enough.

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Brennan: Cam says that the victim's mother is burying him on Christmas morning. 

Booth: I heard that. 

Brennan: It's just him and his mom, right? 

Booth: He worked alone and never had any time for friends. What's wrong? 

Brennan: Max told me that being alone at Christmas means that nobody loves you. She's burying her son. Alone. On Christmas. I think that's heartbreaking. 

Booth: You know, when I say heartbreaking you say the heart is a muscle, so it can't break. It can only get crushed. 

Brennan: Isn't it heartcrushing? 

Booth: You want to go to his funeral? 

Brennan: Yes, I would. Then she won't be alone. 

Booth: You know what, Bones? Sometimes I think your heart muscle is bigger than people give you credit for.

The Dentist in the Ditch - 5x13

Brennan: When Booth and I first met, I didn’t believe that such a thing as love existed. I maintained that it was simply brain chemistry, but perhaps Booth is correct. Perhaps love comes first and then creates the reaction. I have no tangible proof, but I’m willing to accept Booth’s premise.

Booth: To love.

The Beginning in the End
Booth: I don't do really good with change, I guess.

Brennan: Well you're better than I am.

Booth: The pyramids are better at change than you are. (Brennan gives him a hurt look) It’s a joke, okay. I was being affectionate.